What would Speedo do?

AO: Black Widow

When: 12/02/2023

QIC: Zohan

PAX (12): Cox, Darkside, DeLorean, Funyun, Roundup, ShuttleCock, TMI, TURK, Zohan, Gunner, Sven, Corner Kick


Speedo had the Q originally, but I covered for him as he had a personal engagement the evening before. I didn’t want to deprive the PAX from one of his Qs (which I personally like very much), so I thought to incorporate things I know he likes to do and give them my own twist. I’m sure I’ll be getting the editorial review from him later, after he reads this backblast.


A sub par disclaimer to start with. That’s not a Speedo thing. It’s me still recovering from the Ruck/Beatdown with Stroller we two just finished.

Mosey in the parking lot and into the soccer field. Line up on the long line. We’ll be doing one warmup exercise in cadence and as soon as we finish and PAX call Halt, we sprint to the other side of the field and line up for the next exercise.

We did Weed Pickers, Hillbillies, Overhead Claps and Copperhead Squats. 4 sprints in total.

We also did World’s Greatest Stretch and Hangovers, without sprints.

The Thang:

String of Pearls style. Starting at the concession stand between the baseball fields.

Start with 5 Donkey Kicks and on the last one keep your feet against the wall. Now do 5 alpha count Chicken Peckers (shoulder taps with feet on the wall). 10 Donkey Kicks and 10 Chicken Peckers. Then 15 each. The wall was very wet and slippery, so modify the peckers to regular taps if needed.

Mosey to the playground and the monkey bars there for a Morning Call. PAX line up. 2 PAX do 5 pull ups (modify to hanging and bringing knees to chest) while everyone else do 5 Merkins. Rotate PAX. Sounds simple, but there was some confusion and we had more than 2 on the pull ups on occasion. So we did a second round. Wasn’t perfect either, but better. The weather was gloomy, but the moral was high. Lot’s of mumble chatter.

We went to the pavilion in the middle of the playground and partnered up. One PAX holds 6″ while the other does 20 LBCs. Switch. one holds, the other does 20 Freddies alpha count. Switch. 20 Flatter Kicks, switch. Shuttlecock commented that the grunts sound like a maternity ward, which increased the mumble chatter and jokes. YHC improvised by calling 20 Birth Canals to match the theme (Sit-ups, wide legs, as you sit lean forward and touch the ground between your legs).

Mosey to the coupon pile and called for a medium coupon, advising not to overdo it. Most listened. A few regretted. Without dropping the coupons in between – 10 Curls, 10 Skull Crushers, 10 Shoulder Presses. 15 each. 20 each. 25 each. We returned the coupons and did a recovery run.

YHC instructed to pick 2 small, fist size, coupons. 10 Lateral Raises (start with hands close to body and spread arms straight), 10 Monkey Arms alpha count and 10 punches alpha count. then 15 each and 20 each. Finished with another recovery run. Shoulders were on fire.

Mosey a short distance, shortly after we go under the bridge. Time to work on those legs. 10 Jump Squats, 10 Monkey Humpers and 10 alpha count Imperial Walkers. Run down a small hill and back up. 15 each, run. 20 each, run. With hurting legs we moseyed back.

Stopped at the terraces under the pavilion with Dips for the 6. We did 20 Step Ups in cadence, 10 each leading leg. Then 10 Burpees in sloooow cadence.

Mosey back to the flag for Gas Pumpers, Bridges and Jane Fonda (I completely forgot the name during the Q and had to look it up). The PAX were very self aware how ridiculous we all looked, but Hey – this is the gloom!



Black Widow will be closed next week for Santa Ruck and on the 23rd for the annual Christmas beatdown at the Hooch (hurray for Scrooge’s eggnog!!). Prayers for a coworker of Funyon who lost her husband on Thanksgiving.

Naked-Man Moleskin:

This was fun. I think. My arms are tired as I’m writing this backblast. If Speedo won’t approve I’ll just have to try again. Love the PAX. A lot of energy and mumble chatter for a very gloomy and foggy day. This is THE way to start a weekend. See you in the gloom.

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