Defense and Field Goals

AO: Meathouse

When: 2023-11-28

QIC: Popper

PAX (7): Angus, Boomer, Fuzzy Dice, Hackeysack, Half-Dozen, Pigtails


Being a Chicago native and a lifelong Bears fan, YHC is conditioned for two things: cold weather and low-scoring NFC North football games won by defense and field goals. It does not take much to entertain YHC. Writing the weinke while the Bears eked out a 12-10 MNF victory over the Vikings on the strength of 4 field goals and 4 interceptions, and reviewing the morning's weather forecast of a below-freezing windchill, inspired a simple yet effective beatdown plan that would offer some shelter to the Meathouse PAX.


The PAX assembled at 5:30 already mumblechattering over the freezing temps. Disclaimer was recited, and the PAX warmed up to the tune of SSH, Imperial Walker, Windmill, Weed Picker, Little Baby Arm Circles, and Michael Phelps. Fuzzy Dice bucked the crowd and swapped his Windmills and Weed Pickers; light hazing ensued.

The Thang:

The PAX coupon carried to the first lane of the parking deck and partnered up. There are two sides of the parking deck: Theater side and Bridge side
  • Theater-side program: PAX A does 10 Squat Thrusters while PAX B holds plank. Swap.
  • Coupon carry to Bridge side. Halfway, both PAX do 5 Big Boy Situps with the coupon.
  • Bridge-side program: PAX A does 10 single-count Cross-over Merkins while PAX B holds air chair. Swap.
  • Weave around to the next lane, and coupon carry back to Theater side. Halfway, both PAX do 5 alpha-count American Hammers with the coupon.
The PAX rinsed and repeated the above program the entire length of the beatdown, weaving through the lower floor of the parking deck, then wove up the ramp to the very top, then wove back down the ramp and through the lower parking deck again. The final Bridge-side program was performed at the bricks starting point, at which point time expired.


Santa Ruck 12/9: Donate food and toys via Popper at Hooch, and/or donate money via the QR codes floating around Slack. Attend the event and bring 2.0's w/their backpacks to ruck food ~2 miles to North Fulton Community Charities. Xmas bash at Feathers' place 12/15, 7pm. Bring M's. Menorah lighting with bourbon and fire pit at Pigtails' place 12/12. Praises mixed with prayers for YHC's dad in the 2nd round of the fight against leukemia.

Naked-Man Moleskin:

The last time YHC Q'ed Meathouse was over five months ago and was also Hackeysack's FNG beatdown; how fitting that we were partnered up this morning. It was a pleasure to Q a simple yet ruthlessly effective beatdown in honor of the Chicago Bears who keep things simple and sneak a victory over an NFC North rival once every thirteen games or so.

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