Tour of the trees

AO: The Wreck

When: 09/21/2022

QIC: DD (Jamie)

PAX (17): Ariel, Blue, Choo Choo, Circus, Cutie, Deadbeat, Donor, Echo, Foley, Juul, Meltdown, rip, Squeegee, Tubbs, Turbine, Yankee


I hear the new thing to do is post back blast from other people’s perspectives, especially if they weren’t there, so here goes.


Grease Monkey:

Great, DD’s playing a song to start off the work out, I know it’s not going to be Pearl Jam.  Dang it, not only is it not PJ, it’s some guy singing about Sally, I should go take the speaker away from him now.

OK, we are running now.  While I hate running, it’s better than that Sally song.  Wait, he is making me lay on the trail and do LBC’s, such a rookie mistake.  Who let this guy lead, surely someone signed up for today but bailed to allow this to happen – I hate that guy.

More running, maybe I’ll just relive last week’s two concerts in my head and mentally check out.  I wonder why other bands have concerts, it should just be a world of PJ concerts.  And why are they not on the top of a single list of top rock bands of all time.  Not even in the top 5 or 10.  I need to make my own list.  Or maybe just more qualifiers to the list like top grunge band that formed in the 90’s that hung around past the 90’s.  They automatically would be the top then, screw the Foo Fighters.  Dang it, more laying on the jogging path on our backs.  This kid has no clue what he is doing.

Why does he keep reading signpost about trees, this is the lamest workout ever.  If I had a child with Eddie Vedder, he would be the coolest kid ever.  Short, but very cool.  I wonder if we would call him Grease Vedder or Eddie Monkey….definitely Eddie Monkey.  That kid would definitely be a rocker.

O good, we have to do the lame Foley and it’s over.  I’m too old to do the slide, I wonder if I can just skip this and pretend it isn’t my turn.  Let’s just run back so I can get in my truck and get that Sally song out of my head.  Ok, made it to the flag, as long as he doesn’t play another lame song, I think I’m good.



Oh no, DD’s leading.  I’m going to have to co q this thing.  The only thing worst would be Foley or even worse DD and Foley teaming up #nightmare.  Maybe I’ll just take over halfway through and no one will notice.  I bet DD doesn’t even remember the names to any of the exercise.  We are three exercises in and I’m pretty sure he doesn’t remember their names, he is sticking with the old standards, this should be fun.

Should I yell encouragement to him or someone else?  Rusty isn’t here any more to yell at, hmmmmm, who can I yell at?  Maybe once I take over the q, I’ll just yell then.

I’m still ticked he started with a song about Sally.  If you are going to write a song about a person, everyone knows it should be Tom Sawyer.  I bet Grease Monkey changed Sally to Jeremy every time he heard the name.  I know I changed it to Tom in my head for sure.

Maybe while we lay on the pathway and do exercises, I’ll sing songs from a band that hasn’t been relevant since before almost everyone here was even born.  I know they will love that.

DD just took us to the back section of the park.  We never go here.  I wonder if he is lost.  It is definitely time for me to take over the Q.  This could go bad quickly.  Should I call an audible and start a Murph with 15 minutes to go?  I think next time I lead I’ll bring a mirror so I can watch myself doing my exercises.  I wonder if my Merkins are as bad as everyone says, I think they are just jealous.  I mean, being an undercover CIA agent, I know how to do a pushup.

Ok, we are at the playground doing the Foley, I knew Foley would come into play at some point.  It really is the worst workout ever.  I’ll take over Mary when we get back to make sure this thing ends well.

Well, that was easy, at least I still have energy to go kill some bad guys.  I mean do some insurance stuff with databases.  Maybe I should say SQL or Oracle out loud a few times just to keep the façade up.


Squats to Moby’s Flower (song)

20 Side Straddle Hops

The Thang:

2 mile jog around the outside loop of the park

Stopped at each tree signpost.  For those not in attendance, there is an easter egg on the trail if you can find the tree post that is a joke.  Someone in Roswell has a sense of humor.

86 Merkins

86 LBCs

86 Squats

86 Pickle Pushers

86 Monkey Humpers

86 American Hammers

86 Big Boy Situps

86 Jump Squats

A round of Foley at the playground.



Prayer request:

Haley Scott – Doogie’s wife was in an accident and broke several bones in her arm

The dad of the young child who was beaten at the park last week

Naked-Man Moleskin:

Thanks for allowing me to lead today.  It had been a long time and the F3 Lexicon for exercises was pretty weak at this point.  But always enjoy being out with the guys!

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