Menu of Madness

AO: Gladiator

When: 05/12/2022


PAX (9): Bo Knows, Cheneral, DREAMER, Fire Drill, Ironhead, Laces, Scar, Scratch-Off, Brownie


Below is the exact wording the QIC used:

“Welcome to the Gladiator. My name is Dreamer and I will be the Q this morning. Today’s workout will be accompanied by some music. The theme of the music is “these are songs I put on the playlist” and the workout theme is “these are some exercises”.

Any questions? Great – let’s begin.


Simple warm up in the parking lot. Nothing too fancy and brief.

Warm Up songs:

  1. Stacey’s Mom, by Fountains of Wayne
  2. Get Ready, 2 Unlimited

Warm Up:

  • Side Straddle Hops
  • World’s Greatest Stretch
    • If I’m being vulnerable, I have a hard time spelling the word “stretch”. Gets me every time.
  • Moroccan Night Club
    • 1 – I 100% have to google how to spell “moroccan”
    • 2 – Is it “Night Club” or “Night Clubs”?
  • Lap around the parking lot
  • 20 yard bear crawl, 20 yards of broad jumps to the end of the song


The Thang:

Today’s workout was a tried and true “do the exercise until the song changes”

  1. Song = Harder Than You Think (by Public Enemy)
    1. Exercise = 10 merkins, 10 LCBs, take a lap
    2. Important Note = Is is “Merkin” OR “Mercan”?? Still don’t know.
  2. Song = Sabotage (by Beastie Boys)
    1. Exercise = 20 yard bear crawl, 20 yards of broad jumps, take a lap
  3. Song = Dream On (by Aerosmith)
    1. Exercise = 10 Burpees, take a lap. Rinse and repeat suckas
  4. Song = I Still Believe (by Tim Cappello)
    1. Exercise = 20 squats, Sprint the width of the parking lot, 20 alpha count mountain climbers, and keep repeating (insert evil laugh here muwahahah)
  5. Song = Running on My Mind (by Phfat)
    1. Exercise = Bernie Sanders a full lap
  6. Song = Photograph (by Def Leppard)
    1. Exercise = 20 Jump Squats, take a lap
  7. Song = For Whom the Bell Tolls (by Metallica)
    1. Exercise = 10 Merkins, 20 Big Boys, 30 flutters, 40 dips
    2. Important Note #1 = LOTS of discussion on the curb dips. QIC agreed, curb dips take a special level of skill
    3. Important Note #2 = I like to think the band had a long discussion on “is it ‘for WHO the bell tolls’ OR ‘for WHOM the bell tolls'”
  8. Song = Shoot to Thrill (by ACDC)
    1. Exercise = 30 seconds of high knees, 30 side straddle hops, take a lap
  9. Song = Shipping off to Boston (by Dropkick Murphys)
    1. Exercise = 10 crunchy frogs, 10 American Hammers, 15 Burpees
    2. Important Note = Yes, plenty of Departed references were had. Probably the correct amount.


No announcement or prayers. PAX was quiet this morning. I guess they were catching their breath.

Naked-Man Moleskin:


What a morning. Thank you for pushing yourself and working hard. Grateful for each of you. To be honest, I typed out 4 different responses for this section but all weren’t funny enough so I’ll just keep it simple:

  • Thankful for each of you.
  • I pray the Lord blesses each of you.
  • Thank you for taking beat downs as seriously as you need to.

Until next time!

Keep Dreaming

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