Seeking hills to avoid Hillseeker

AO: The Widowmaker

When: 03/20/2021

QIC: Speedo

PAX (11): Cox, Zohan, Danno, Funyon (R), Dosido, Youtube, Zuul (R), Catfish, Pumba (R), Meatball,


It was a colder than expected morning but 11 PAX (and 4 pre-ruckers) posted despite the weather and the temptation to go run up mountains with the Hillseeker nut jobs PAX.  A brief but thorough disclaimer was given and off we went.


Ran between the baseball field to the far parking lot where a lone City of Alpharetta truck was trying to drive up the sidewalk we had just run down.  Warmup included:

  • SSH x21
  • Weed pickers x11
  • Hillbillies x11
  • Good Mornings x20 oyo


The Thang:

Moseyed to the fence along the lower/back/east/corner/grass soccer field where YHC somehow thought a chain-link fence would be a good substitute for a brick wall.  PAX were instructed to line up by the fence facing away and on my count, we would do 5 donkey kicks and then hold our feet up on the fence until I said drop.  The fence was definitely not a brick wall and YHC struggled until I found a sturdy section.  We repeated with 10 kicks and a longer hold then again with 15 kicks and a long hold.  The holds are actually the easy part of this one for YHC and the last few kicks of that set of 15 about killed me.

Moseyed to the manhole cover on the Widowmaker and instructed the PAX that, in support of our Hillseeker brothers we were going to do 7’s starting with 6 merkins at the manhole cover then 1 monkey humper at the top crosswalk.  The same truck from earlier came by again and Zohan tried to EH him into joining us.  Some excuse about having to work and having more common sense than to run up and down hills. The gazelles were asked to find Cookie who was endlessly running the hill and give him some moral support since he was on about climb 23 of a planned 35!

After instructing the PAX to pick up a curlable coupon from the piles next to the Widowmaker, we went down to the bottom of the Widowmaker where YHC had dropped off a whiteboard and some numbered raffle tickets.  The intent was to look at the last number on the raffle ticket (0 – 9) and then find the corresponding exercise on the whiteboard and do it.  If the ticket said the word ‘Coupon’ on it then do the exercise in the ‘with coupon’ column WITH YOUR COUPON.  Most PAX figured it out quickly while one of them must have gotten a few #2’s and disappeared in the bathroom for a few minutes.  Some claimed they never repeated an exercise while others drew blockees with the coupon 3 times.  They can only blame themselves for picking the wrong ticket.  Zohan tried to EH a dog walker who we’ve seen before.  He’ll eventually cave to the headlock pressure Zohan can exert.

With a few minutes remaining, we moseyed, stumbled, and otherwise climbed back up the Widowmaker, returning the coupons on the way.  We headed to the middle of the pitch where we circled up for Duck Duck Q.  The first man calls an exercise then runs around the circle while everyone else does that exercise.  It started out tame then got a little rough when Dosido called burpees and then kinda sorta ‘ran’ the circle.  Let’s just say I’ve seen mall walkers moving faster than he was.

After everyone had a turn we still had about 90 seconds so YHC called for an air chair.  To take our mind off the increasing pain we went around the circle and each guy was asked to name the next prime number.  Cox drew the number 1 which turned out well because his brain was apparently not in the mood to calculate prime numbers and his next answer was something like ‘hamburger’.  Some PAX were quick while others seemed dazed and confused.  Call me a nerd but it was just a distraction from the real work of a 90+ second air chair until time was called.


Zohan reminded us of Q Source zoom on Sunday nights at 7 pm.  This week’s topic is 2.0’s. Check the General channel on Slack for more details.

Prayers lifted up for wisdom when using our words with those who we disagree with (and who disagree with us), for our Hillseeker brothers and other PAX who were unable to be there with us today.

Naked-Man Moleskin:

Thanks for allowing me to lead and for putting up with the crazy stuff we do.  It’s always an honor and pleasure to lead at the Widowmaker.

— Speedo out

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