Firehouse Spring Training…. PLAY BALL!

AO: Firehouse

When: 03/09/2021

QIC: Ace Ventura

PAX (10): Ace Ventura Script Kiddie Dunshire Dash JavaDog Schneider Buckeye Lightweight Suarez Coach K


10 PAX assembled on time to prepare for spring training baseball themed beatdown from Ace Ventura.


Per AO routine, PAX did a mosey to the warmup spot.  The following warm ups were completed:

Side-Straddle Hops

Weed Pickers


Sun gods

Reverse sun gods

PAX then moseyed to the field for beat down.

The Thang:

PAX shouted out their numbers and were pared at the appropriate base from their numbers.  Each base of PAX required a different exercise.  When home plate was finished with a set number of burpees, they would bear crawl to first base, where the first base PAX bear crawled to second, and so forth.  The round was completed when the original home plate PAX reached home base again.

Appropriately, John Fogerty’s Centerfield began as PAX were told…. “PLAY BALL!”

Round One:

Home plate – Burpees (20)

First Base – Shoulder tap Merkins

Second Base – Squats

Third Base – American Hammers


PAX completed a 2 rest before commencing round 2:

Home Base – Burpees with sideway leaps (10)

First Base – Carolina Dry Docks

Second Base – Leg Lifts

Third Base – Freddie Mercury’s


Coach was pleased with the team’s performance, but felt they needed to improve on team speed.  Suicide sprints were required.

PAX sprinted a quarter of the way down the field, and walked back in recovery.  Then they ran to half-field, and walked back for recovery.  They ran three-quarters of the way through the field, then walked back in recovery.  Finally, PAX sprinted all the way across the field, walking back in recovery.

PAX completed a medium speed Mosey around the field before returning to the flag for a round of Mary.

Lightweight – Leg Lifts

Coach K – Planks

Dunshire – WW2 situps

During the Mary, Lightweight made an innocent joke, where Ace Ventura’s piggy backed into crude humor.  Dash took the opportunity to make a derogatory (but playful)  comment about Ace Ventura’s genitalia size.  Dash was lucky this was the end of the BD, or significant punishment would have been doled out.  Ace Ventura plans significant revenge at his next Q.



There were no announcement or specific prayer requests from PAX, as they must have been too broken down from the beatdown to think about anything outside their own pain.

PAX prayed in thanks to their blessings of being able to gather and make each other better through mind, body and soul.  Prayers were also offered to the sad clowns out there we have not been able to reach yet and that they may find solace in what they need to improve their lives.

The 6th man was Dash, who the PAX had the pleasure of getting to know better.  Dash described his family situation of being married and having a blended family, and how his children recently moved to Indiana (a 15 year old and a 13 year old).

MOC (moment of clarity) was provided by Ace Ventura.  He stressed the need to keep moving past failure in all endeavors.  He provided the analogy of the greatest hitter in baseball history, Ted Williams, had a .341 career batting average.  This means he stilled failed over 65% of the time he went to the plate (walks not included).  PAX were encouraged to look at failure as a learning experience and a normal part of life and to push past the pain and disappointment of failure to continue seeking success in all endeavors (personal relationships, business, fitness, etc).

Naked-Man Moleskin:

After COT and picture, PAX enjoyed fellowship over coffee provided by Dash and Dunshire.  PAX discussed Beatdowns they have enjoyed, and the impending Cherokee takeover of Firehouse next week by Dunshire and Mouth-to-Mouth.  Also, PAX discussed local building ordinances and the absurdity of permitting and costs.


After fellowship, Lightweight, Schneider, Script Kiddie, and Dunshire took the opportunity to return to the first F for a post Beatdown run (even though what Ace Ventura was doing could barely be called running…….).

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