The 2021 Edition of The Barkley 5K

AO: The Widowmaker

When: 02/06/2021

QIC: Ha-ha

PAX (36): Flo, Cookie, Lumbergh, False Start, YouTube, Woody, BallBoy, Dosido, Dugger, Smoked, Shirley, Hanson, Homer, Crabcake, Pumba (R), Birdie (R), NRA, Lefty, Dreamer, Meatball, Animal, Mayhem, Speedo (R), Stroller, Nomad, Transcript, StiffArm, Saint 2.0, Honey Glazed, Whiz, Special K (R), Skippy, Delta, Zohan, Miller Time, Ha-ha (RR)


Once again it is YHC’s birthday weekend and once again it is time to crush the spirits of the PAX who assemble to try and complete the Barkley 5K. A new crop of PAX get introduced to the craziness that is the Barkley 5K and they go home with crushed dreams and spirits.


No warm-o-rama. More of an intruction-o-rama.

A completed race is 5 laps. Each lap is 7 checkpoints that are hidden in the park. At each checkpoint is a book that each team needs to tear out the page the corresponds the teams “bib number”. After each completed lap, each team returns to the start to turn in their pages, get a new bib number and start the next lap.  At each checkpoint there is an exercise to complete before heading to the next checkpoint.

Spoiler alert: no one finished… again.

The Thang:

The PAX were stretched out in the parking lot in roughly by their running speed: 7 minute milers at one end, 10 minute milers at the other. 7 captains were chosen however we ended up with 6 captains. each captain selected team members from various points along the spectrum of speed so the teams were roughly equal. Each team was given a map with the checkpoints on it and each team was given a different checkpoint to start from so each team would theoretically be running and finding the books without help from another team. More about that plan in a minute.

  1.  60 Merkins each PAX
  2. 60 Squats each PAX
  3. 10 Burpee each PAX
  4. 1 Bear Crawl lap around the tennis court each PAX
  5. 60 LBCs each PAX
  6. 60 Dips each PAX
  7. 30 Box Jumps each PAX

F is the flag

As YHC was running the course and monitoring progress is was clear one team was not going in order of the checkpoints but was freestyling it, *cough* *Cookie* *cough*.

First loser, failure to listen to directions.

All teams completed 1 lap.  Several teams did not make the time hack for cutoff at 8:00 (more losers). All the rest that made it back by the time hack did not finish the race, ALL losers!

Video from the race:


I hope it was fun anyhow! YHC has ideas for mixing it up again next year so never the same race twice!


Prayers for those with COVID, injuries and other sicknesses.

Climb Killi Challenge


Naked-Man Moleskin:

What better time of year to have a birthday but to share the weekend with the men of Alpha at the Widowmaker and the Super Bowl!

Leave a Comment