The Beatdown That Wasn’t

AO: The H0.0ch

When: 04/19/2019

QIC: Popper

PAX (1): Popper


As the heavy thunderstorm billowed and raged in the early morning hours of Good Friday, many smart PAX reported into The Hooch / H0.0ch Twitter group that they would smart sack to, you know, survive. Heads up decision-making by my brethren.

YHC dutifully posted for the Shield Lock Run at 5am, with every intention of Q-ing the beatdown at 5:30am. This was to honor his commitment to facilitate pain and suffering in the gloom for any PAX who were still interested in braving the bad and worsening tempest.


The Shield Lock Run at The H0.0ch traces a roughly pentagonal route, if the upper-left corner of the pentagon were removed. PAX mosey from the pavilion parking spot northeast through the Perimeter Church parking lot, southeast on Medlock Crossing, south by southwest on Medlock Bridge Road (141), west on Old Alabama, and north by northwest thru the parking lot. Rinse and repeat, then finish out with a half lap, and you’ve got your 5k.

With YHC as the only PAX in attendance, the SLR-of-1 was off to a rainy start.

The Thang:

Thang 1: Bravery on Windward Crossing

YHC thinks: I’ve got this. Just a little rain. And heavy winds with strong gusts. And lightning. And thunder. And now the rain is blowing straight into my face, decreasing visibility. YHC has got this.

Thang 2: Perseverance on Medlock Bridge Road

YHC turns southwest. Wind turns directions and blows north, so rain continues to blow straight into my face. Man vs nature. Nature will die down, and Man will win. A storm can’t sustain this heavily for long. Ouch, is that hail? Not just any hail. Face hail. No one is out driving in this, much less moseying (except for YHC). YHC has got this.

Thang 3: Lights Out on Old Alabama

YHC turns west, and the strong winds become gale force. Whipping northwards, rain and hail hammer the left half of my body like bullets. Cannot see anything but the street lights. Gale bursts carry new sheets of hail and rain.


Now power is out on Old Alabama. Street lamps, traffic lights and Perimeter Church lights are all out, leaving only YHC’s trusty head lamp to light the way. YHC can no longer run in a straight line due to high winds, nor clearly see where he is going. A clamorous electric cracking and popping ominously rattles above the noise of the storm, just beyond the trees to my left. I begin to pray.

Thang 4: Sprint back to the chariot

Nature wins, as YHC experiences the outer edge of CSAUP. The mosey has turned into an all-you-got in the dark north through the Perimeter Church parking lot. Through blinding rain, I see a fallen tree on the church grounds. Somewhere I’m proud that a wind that knocks over trees cannot not knock over me. To my left, the pavilion lights are out, a casualty of the same grid failure as Old Alabama. Even if I was brave / dumb enough to try to lead the BD at this point, our AO is out of commission. I pray for survival and home. By the grace of God I return to my car, tweet out to the PAX that the BD is cancelled, and warn the few remaining HC’s to stay home. YHC sees a warning from Stickers that a tornado is moving up from Berkeley Lake. No time to dawdle. After a precarious drive home, YHC is united with the M and 2.0’s.




Today’s SLR and BD consisted of 1/3 of an SLR by 1 PAX, and no BD. But the good news is, no one died.

Great idea by Ha-Ha to postpone the CrossRuck. Popper will be postponing his 4/19 Q to a later date.

Naked-Man Moleskin:

Thanking the Lord for a safe return and wiser outlook for future such situations.

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