Cinders, Farmers, and Big Balls?

AO: Gladiator

When: 01/15/2019

QIC: Spandex

PAX (): Puddle Jumper, Sox, Shrinkage, Tebow, Stroller, Postal, DEFCON2, Delicious, StudFinder, Viking, Renegade, Scar, Laces, Trill, Mufasa, Moonshine, Spandex

I don’t know what it is, but whenever I have the Q the next morning I just don’t sleep well the night before. I don’t know whether it’s fear of oversleeping and receiving overwhelming ridicule from the PAX for a no-show Q or whether I’m just a little bit nervous about leading the group. Whatever the reason, it keeps me on my toes and gets me ready to lead.

Arrival time for me this morning was a little bit earlier than usual. I had to set out the cinders, plant the flags, and of course, set up the PLC (parking lot coffeteria).  When I pulled into The Gladiator parking lot around 5:00, there were already several other cars there. It was Mufasa, Stroller, DC2 and I don’t recall who else that showed up for a pre beatdown run.  Tebow however, was nestled into his “mobile fart sack” because he showed up a few minutes late to meet the guys for the run.

After parking I began unloading the cinders, setting up the flags, and then ultimately the PLC, while Tebow continued to sit in his warm “mobile fart sack” watching as if he were a job foreman on a construction site. Something finally prompted him to come out and see if I needed any help. It was great timing on his part because I had just finished setting everything up. It reminded me of my M coming in the kitchen after I’ve cleaned everything up to ask if she can help in any way. Timing is everything.

After setting up, I still had over five minutes to spare before the beat down begin, so I got back into my “mobile fart sack” and enjoyed the warmth. Shortly after that DC2 comes running to my car spewing mockery towards me and Tebow as if we were doing something illegal by enjoying the warmth of our cars. After that tongue lashing, I get out of the car and the rest of the PAX started showing up. The Gladiator had a total of 17 PAX this morning for a very cool and somewhat breezy morning for a cinder beatdown.

The usual and customary disclosure was given and then we were underway. We took a short mosey to the soccer field and ran around the perimeter of the field to warm up a bit and then we circled up in the center.

The warmup:

  • 15 SSH
  • 10 Windmills
  • 20 arm circles front
  • 20 arm circles rear

After the warmup, we moseyed back to the parking lot so each PAX could pick up a cinder.  In case you were wondering, each cinder weighs 27.5 lbs. unless you got one from Scar’s car.  His are usually a bit heavier because he marinates them in the rain, while mine are stored in the garage.  Just an FYI.

After collecting our cinders, we proceeded back to the soccer field for the thang.  Sox felt the need to express his displeasure in having to backtrack.  “We could have brought these with us when we warmed up.”  Well, Sox, you can do whatever the heck you want when YOU Q!!!

The Thang:

After returning to the soccer field the PAX lined up their cinder blocks on the baseline and waited for instructions for the first exercise.

Exercise 1:

  • 20 Walkover Merkins
  • Lunge walk with cinder to the penalty box
  • Run a full lap around the perimeter of the soccer field
  • Mary for the 6

It was during the lunge walk when the location of Manchester was brought up.  DC2 explained that Manchester’s kid was up in the middle of the night getting sick and Manchester fartsacked as a result.  DC2 mentioned that Manchester has the Q on Thursday and was going to be bringing something of interest.  More on this later…

After returning from a lap the PAX lined up with their cinders at the penalty box and waited for instructions on exercise 2.  In the interest of trying something a little different, a cinder press with leg raise was introduced.

Exercise 2:

  • 20 Cinder presses with leg raise (Touch toe to cinder when arms are extended)
  • Lunge walk with cinder to midfield
  • Run a full lap around the perimeter of the soccer field
  • Mary for the 6

The next exercise is what started creating a bit of mumble chatter.  Stroller commented that he’s predicting a trend shift of…

OUT:  Bonnie Blairs

IN:  Hydraulic Squats

Exercise 3:

  • 20 Hydraulic Squats with cinder press
  • Lunge walk with cinder to next penalty box
  • Run a full lap around the perimeter of the soccer field
  • Mary for the 6

And last but not least was exercise number 4.  Pretty straight forward here but a good way to finish off some upper body and core strength.

Exercise 4:

  • 20 cinder curls and 20 kettle swings
  • Lunge walk with cinder to the baseline
  • Run a full lap around the perimeter of the soccer field
  • Mary for the 6

We were pretty much done with the cinders at this point except for a 310+ yard, 2 cinder, farmers carry.  Mufasa really liked this one and provided the estimated distance of this carry.  We partnered up and one partner grabbed both cinders and began the trek while the other partner did high knees and jump squats if/when the one carrying the cinders needed a break.

DC2 was my partner and he was killing it at this exercise.  I mean really concentrating and working hard.  He was about halfway through and really struggling when he tried to make a deal with me.  He said, “If I finish without stopping, will you leave out of your back blast what I said earlier about Manchester and his big balls.”  I agreed, and DC2 DID finish without stopping.  So, per our agreement, I will not disclose what DC2 said about Manchester’s big balls.

Partner one completed the 310+ yard, 2 cinder, farmers carry and then it was partner two’s turn.  We all struggled through and Mary ensued until the 6 arrived.  We recovered for a brief moment and headed back to the flag.

While carrying the cinders back to the flag I saw Viking carrying his cinder Cusak style.  I yelled out to carry Cusak back to the flag at some of the gazelles up ahead.  I’m pretty sure they heard me but decided to execute their selective hearing as they would if their Ms were asking them to take out the trash.  Anyway, the PAX formed up at the flag for a final three or four exercises of Mary and called it a beatdown.


An update was given on the condition of both Brownie and Jason.  Their surgery was successful and they are both at home recovering in comfort with their families.

Mufasa promoted the health benefits of Rucking and posted an article which can be found here:

It was a pleasure posting with you this morning!!!

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