Trapezoid of Misery

AO: The Wreck

When: 09/24/2018


PAX (): Squeegee, Devito, Grease Monkey, Raider, Rooney, Swamp Donkey, Jackelope, Zima, Ponyboy, Ariel, Goat, Hosen, Foley, Divot, Bieber, AFLAC

If YHC is being honest, Sunday football came and went without so much as a shred of planning for a looming Monday Q.  It wasn’t until the Patriots lost my attention did I start pondering whether we could actually squeeze in a 5k plus 100 Burpees in a traditional beatdown that wasn’t exclusively running and Burpees.  Knowing that Devito (human abacus) has been a regular Monday poster was good enough incentive to test this theory, as he’s usually good for keeping PAX honest on the numbers.


As 0530 drew near, there was some random mumble-chatter from PAX who neglected to properly pre-game by checking the Q sheet.  Nothing stirs a Q more than knowing that PAX have certain expectations, and with those firmly established we were off.

Mosey along the trail past the tennis courts and up the hill.  A quick spot-check on PAX by the pond found Goat reliably picking up the six.  Continue mosey around the pond, up the hill, and circle-up at the recreation center parking lot for the following:

  • 15 SSHs
  • 15 Hill-billys
  • 15 Mountain Climbers

Continue mosey down the hill toward the main parking log, where YHC decided to take PAX on a quick scout of today’s route as Google Maps can only give you so much.  With the dimensions firmly established (a trapezoid of sorts), gather PAX at the far-sideline of the lacrosse field to establish some parameters of misery.

The Thang:

YHC directed PAX to run laps (approx 1/4 mi) with 4 exercise stations as follows:

  • Burpees (start)
  • Derkins (South lacrosse field wall)
  • Box Jumps (wall near stadium)
  • Incline merkins (North lacross field wall)

All of the above sounds fine and good, until you explain to PAX that reps will start with 13 and decrease by 1 for each lap completed.  Some decent mumble-chatter coming from the math experts as YHC added that important detail.  Time to see how many laps/reps we could get in.

Solid work by all PAX, with some smartly substituting step-ups for box jumps.

With 7 laps (and 70 reps) in the books and time winding down, it became pretty clear to YHC that there was no way PAX was going to finish this one.  Halfway through the 8th lap, YHC called time and asked Squeegee to sweep the opposite direction and gather PAX at the start for further instructions.  As the 6 rolled in, YHC requested a Burpee audit and Devito was reliably quick to the chase rightly noting that we owed 21 (?) more for an honest beatdown.   As someone famous once said, “so let it be stated, so let it be done” (or something like that).

Once completed, final mosey back to the flag for some quick Mary:

  • American Hammers
  • Peter Parkers (YHC was delirious at this point and did Mountain Climbers instead).


  • Pushing for 5 VQ’s in October.  So far, we have HC’s from Swamp Donkey, Bieber, Foley, Ariel… (let me know if I missed anyone).
  • Q school will be held this Friday at 0510 (just prior to the Friday beatdown).
  • Not formally a COT item, but some chatter of a convergence coming up – pencil 10/20 on your calendars.

AFLAC out.


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