5k of Pain

AO: The Wreck

When: 02/14/2018


PAX (): Thumper, Sprocket, Circus, TP, Bear, Crab Legs, Grease Monkey, Smackdown, Rusty, Bronco, Turbine, Polaroid, Doogie, Miller Time, AFLAC

Since the Strongest PAX award had started gathering dust at my place for the past couple of months, YHC figured it was a fine time to spread the wealth and bring a little friendly competition to the Wreck to pass the torch.  Of course, this would require bringing more than your average beat-down to produce a clear winner.  With that (and thanks to the Rubicon boys for some ideas) a plan was hatched.


Mosey up the main drag to the main parking lot near the football field, with a short surveillance run around the perimeter of both fields to establish the track.  Circle up on the football field for a quick round of the following:

  • 30 SSHs
  • 15 Abe Vigodas
  • 15 Imperial Walkers

Short mosey toward the field entrance where a leisurely set of exercises was waiting for the PAX on a board.  Each exercise would be followed by a lap (1/4’ish of a mile) around the outside perimeter of the football field.

  • 100 Burpees
  • 100 Merkins (okay, so that might have been a mistake right after Burpees)
  • 100 One-legged Romanian Deadlifts (50/leg)
  • 100 Stone Mountains (aka Carolina Dry Docks)
  • 100 Jump Squats
  • 100 Diamond Merkins
  • 100 American Hammers (2-count)
  • 100 Squats
  • 100 Shoulder Taps
  • 100 Plank Jacks
  • 100 LBC’s
  • 100 J-Lo’s
  • Repeat

The rules of Strongest PAX today were simple – the PAX who makes it the furthest takes the crown.  With some classic rock anthems (shared here) queued up for motivation, we were off.

For the record, it’s not humanly possible to complete 100 Burpees during Welcome to the Jungle.  Some finished during Dr. Feelgood, while others stretched into Enter Sandman.  That’s a good 10-15 minutes of Burpees for those keeping score.

It was pretty clear early on that this would be Crab Leg’s contest to lose.  YHC was pacing him pretty well, then came to the realization that his was a loser’s quest as past winners were DQ’d (new rule to spread the wealth).

Great work by everyone on a solid beat-down.  With 5 minutes to go, YHC requested Sprocket sweep the six while the remaining PAX finished their current round.  With the six in tow, mosey back to the flag.  No time for Mary today.  By my watch, we clocked-in just over 3 miles for the morning.  Not too shabby considering the pain that was wedged in between laps.


  • YHC only noticed at the end that Virginia Slim was fart-sacking YHC’s Q.  That’ll come back around.
  • Prayers for little Truett and his parents (friends of Bronco’s) who is dealing with some difficult health struggles.
  • 3rd F opportunity tomorrow (2/15) at Crazy Love, with possible 05:15 run beforehand.
  • 2nd F opportunity next Thursday (2/22) at Avalon (The Beer Garden).
  • F3 Alpha LinkedIn Group has been created for members of F3 Alpha and associated AO’s.  See https://www.linkedin.com/groups/8654152 to join.

AFLAC out.

Leave a Comment